Thursday, February 16, 2012

Stoic? I Think Not

Woke up this morning feeling a little sad.  Don't know why when there is so much to be happy about.   So, I will just will myself to feel happy.   Because I think happy is a choice.   And I think anybody who's not crazy or evil would choose happy.   And although I'm a little weird, I am not crazy, nor am I evil.   So, happy it is.   Which triggers a memory from years ago.  

I worked with a woman many many years ago.  I was single and not very experienced in life, but I think I can say that my life was good.   She was single also and her life wasn't always the easiest, nor was it always filled with goodness.   But she always came to work with a smile, and it was planted on her face all day long.  Always.  No matter what.   Smiling.   To tell the truth, it kind of annoyed me.  I'm not sure why.  Maybe I was a little envious.   (Someone called me stoic once, which I had to look up.  I'm sure Mark could have told me what it meant.   Somebody impassive.    Patient/uncomplaining in the face of adversity.    I didn't like the first definition.  It's not a good interpretation of me.) 

Anyway, back to my co-worker.  One day her smileyness must have really been bothering me because I KNEW she wasn't happy.  So, and maybe this was really rude of me, but I asked her this:  "How can you act so happy all the time?!?!"    Her answer has always stayed with me:  "I'm not happy all the time.  But I figure if I smile and act happy, then eventually I will become happy."   I looked at her differently every day since then, and l smiled.  I learned a great lesson from her that day.  Happiness IS a choice. 

Choose happiness.  The alternative will make you stoic.

11 comments:

  1. that is what they say but not always very easy to do or even to believe

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  2. Write on, Judy. I am so on board for this post; it's so you!

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  3. Early in our marriage, my husband told me I was choosing to be mad. He was right, but it was still irritating that he caught on to it so quickly!

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  4. I too believe happiness is a choice. As Swindoll said, "Life is 10% what happens to you, 90% how you react to it." Loved the post.

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  5. Another thing to consider, however, is that pretending to be happy is not always the healthiest choice.

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  6. I used to work with a woman who was always unhappy and complaining. It was so hard to be positive after spending all day with her. Choosing to be happy is the best choice.

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  7. Judy..Loved this post today. I learned this lesson the hard way (don't we all). So now I tell my hormonal, moody 11 year old beautiful daughter this everyday..choose happiness! Love it!!

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  8. Sounds like an excellent lesson learned

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  9. Absolutely. I couldn't agree more. Our position isn't nearly as important as our disposition. Gotta smile ... and it doesn't cost a thing.

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  10. "Fake it 'til you make it." is a time-honored slogan in the recovery and psychology movement, but I do think there's a point at which you're just faking it period and that can be unhealthy, as JT mentioned. It's a fine line, like so many things. That said, I don't working on being as positive as possible in the face of whatever you've got going on is ever a bad thing.

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