My Adventure With The Creepy Looking 8-Legged Mutant-Faced Things

I'm sure you didn't miss me, but I've been gone for a few days.  

Last Saturday I was unwillingly guided to a cave-like place by a little, creepy looking, hairless creature.   He left me there.   Total abandonment.  I thought we were friends, or at least had a mutual respect, but I guess not.  I didn't know where I was or how to get out. When I was trying to figure my way out, I was attacked by a giant, disgusting eight-legged freak of nature.  I tried to get away, but it was too fast and too big.  It pierced me with its pincer-like tentacles and paralyzed me.   While I lay there, rendered helpless, it wrapped me in a cocoon and left me there, lying on the floor of the cave, while it went and looked for more prey, I guess.   Laying there helpless, wrapped up tight and unable to move or speak, three horrid, big, mutant-faced "things" came and found me.  They spoke with some sort of weird accent.  They poked at me and I guess they figured I was dead.  They picked me up and took me up to where they lived.   They dumped me on the floor and talked about how they should eat me.  I was certain I was to be their dinner.   Just as I was about to give up hope of ever getting out alive . . . in came my best and most loyal friend ever . . . and he saved me.   And then we found our way home.

And here I am.  I am back.