Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Need Help? Call 1-800 MYHUSBAND

Our children are grown up, one in college out of state, one working full-time a couple hours away, and the other married and going to school and working.   Empty nesters, really. 

Yet . . . are we??? 

My husband has a kind, soft heart.  He likes to help people.   Maybe that's why he became a counselor.   He will drop everything and come running in a heartbeat if you need help.   

Well, someone needs help.   And he's seven years old.  And he's had a hard go of it in his short little life.  His mother and father weren't married.   Mom has a drug problem and was in jail.  So "little boy" went to stay with his father.   His father was arrested and became a guest of the county.   "Little boy" went to a foster home.   Father then was released and soon thereafter found dead on a street corner.   Mom was released from jail but is in no position or doesn't want to care for "little boy."   Grandma and aunt came from out of state to take "little  boy" home with them.   Apparently it's not quite that easy.  Grandma and aunt have to go through the process of being approved, and that takes time . . . lots of time.    So, in the mean time, grandma and aunt have gone back to their home out of state while they wait to be approved and "little boy" continues to be in the foster home.   

The foster home consists of six foster boys and a foster mother and father.   The foster mother doesn't speak English.   Really?!  I didn't know they could place children with people who can't communicate with them.   All the other foster boys are older than "little boy" and he gets a little lost.   I mean, it's probably hard enough having a mother who can't or doesn't want to care for you and a father who is dead.   But to be invisible in a roomful of people would be mega hard.  

So, my kind husband had the idea of us (yes, the empty nesters) bringing in "little boy" to stay with us while his grandma and aunt are going through the process of approval.   So, we filled out a zillion forms and now we were just informed that our home is scheduled for a walk-thru today.  Immediately I am panicking - - not because of the reality of  "little boy" coming to stay with us.   No, that's the easy part.   No, I'm panicking because I am picturing every little dusty corner of my house , and I didn't have time to clean the bathroom superclean, and I have laundry piled up in the laundry room, and the room we have for "little boy" is our daughter's old room and it's painted pink!   Well, not pink pink, but a shade of pink/lavendar.  Not a boy's color at all.   And the living room needs to be vacuumed, and I wonder if my house smells funny - - will I have time to light a candle before the CPS worker comes??   

I guess I just need to breathe and think of the positive.  "Little boy" will have his own room.  He will not be invisible.  And . . . we speak English.    

19 comments:

  1. Well, Judy... you and your husband can consider yourselves part of the proverbial "village" and thank you for doing so.

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  2. Wow! Bless your hearts for taking "little boy" for a while. I'm sure it will be a positive experience for him - something he most definitely needs!

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  3. Good for you Judy. I think the world of the dedicated souls that take in foster children, whether for a day or a week or a lifetime. I tip my hat to you and send you all kinds of blessings for opening your home.

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  4. I think you and your husband will make a HUGE impact and difference in this little boys life. A child needs stability and love. That (and more) is what you are offering. That is what will shine through to the CPS workers. Good Luck...

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  5. Judy, You performed a similar service for me, this morning with your eloquent three-word comment. that your husband performs regularly. You lent a helping hand. None of my many new readers knows you. Period. And yet you reach out with a random act of kindness to Baby Kaiden, and I see instant results. Buddha bless you.

    And Judy? My sons Benjamin Paul O'Neill and Nathaniel Mark (Lito) O'Neill perform a dual role in their respective communities. They are Cal-Fire Studs, and volunteer firemen/EMT/Haz-Mat officials...I must be boring you. They do things routinely, that I could never do once in my lifetime. On the other hand, both Benny and Litp have gone on record, as saying that teaching 37 gnarly eighth graders simultaneously would terrify them, so turn-about is fair play.

    Thank your significant other for his contributions, and know that those efforts make a difference.

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    1. We all do what we can, which is different for everyone. You sound rightly proud of your "little boys." And, I'm with them - 37 (or even 1) gnarly eighth grader would make me cry with fear! You need to tell me where to send my contribution(s).

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  6. rae, SherryE, Sarah, Gossip_Girl and Jennifer - - I imagine that each of you has your own way of giving back. Your writing, with the humor and talent shining through, gives me something every single day! So, thank you!!

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  7. If a lavender room turns off a social worker, then there is really something terribly wrong with our system. Light the candle, if it will help ease the anxiety, and then relax. Good luck, break a leg, or whatever fits the situation. The little guy is so fortunate to have someone care about him. I hope his Grandma and Aunt will be as good to him when the time comes.

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  8. totally impressed, how wonderful, generous !
    I think this is just simply awesome and great.
    Believe me, you do not need to worry about dust, pink color, laundry.... if anyone would care, they are not wroth it, that's my point of view
    am confident that all will go well
    anni

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  9. I think you are doing a good thing. What matters to the social workers is a safe home that they can place that little boy in.

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  10. Beeeooootiful. Just one more reason I love you. He can come play with my little man anytime. You rock, Judy!!! xo!

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    1. Lisa - don't think I won't take you up on that :)

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  11. I really doubt that those CPS workers will notice a speck of dust or a less than spotless bathroom or the load of laundry in the - where else? - laundry room. They will be way too busy being knocked over by the warmth, kindness, and affection that live at your house!

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    1. After talking to the CPS worker for about 45 minutes she almost left without even walking through the house - haha

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  12. I doubt the inspector will care about dust ... I suspect he or she will meet you and your husband and see that this is a great place for a kid to be while the red tape is worked through ... wishing you good luck, but I dont think you will need luck .. just a lot of patience dealing with a kid who has had a lot happen in a short time ..

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  13. Your home sounds wonderful.. Dust bunnies in the corners, fuzzies on the floor, last night's dinner in the air.. Sounds like home to me..

    God Bless you both.. “Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.”

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    1. MiMi - please, I'm at work - - stop making me cry :)

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  14. I'm pretty sure I had a blog crush on your husband once before... or maybe it was someone else's husband... Well it's yours today :)

    For some reason, I know the soc workers look to make sure all items in the fridge are securely covered. (Don't remember where that random bit of info came from!)

    * Catching up. It may take me a bit. Will get as far as I can!

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