My brilliant niece came through for me and fixed my blog, so it's back to business . . .
So, you may recall that a few weeks ago I nearly choked to death. Really. As in "to death." Like in "never to roam the earth again in flesh and bones." (Although, I am sure that I would visit in spirit - have your EMF detectors handy.)
I joke a little about it now, but at the time it was very serious and very traumatic - - for me and my family who were there, watching me choke. And it still is serious, and yesterday I realized that it truly was traumatic for me. I had another little choking experience, alone in the basement where I work, and although it wasn't serious and I knew I wasn't going to die, it was still very very scary and I almost panicked. I know what you're thinking. "Why doesn't she just chew her food??" I do. Honest. But it was then that I knew that PTSD is real. And for all who have suffered traumatic life experiences, I am sorry. And I kind of get it, albeit in a small way. And I also realized that with each life experience we have, whether big or small, we can feel a little closer to one another, a little more empathetic, a little more compassionate.
And I also realized that I am never going to eat anything again that I can't sip though a straw . . . ever.
Random thoughts of a girl who used to try to fit in the box. Then I realized that boxes are stupid. Except this box, the one above. It's really pretty.
I am concerned about these choking incidents. You might want to be checked to see if you have Achalasia.
ReplyDeleteoooh, now i'm going to have to google :)
Deletegoogled achalasia - - i'm thinking i don't have it :)
DeleteAh OK. All I know about it is that people have a hard time swallowing and have to eat tiny bites of food to get it down.
DeleteThat's so understandable. Really, everybody defines traumatic incidents themselves. It's all relative. The choking incident must have acted as a reminder or brought up some of your inner fears.
ReplyDeleteOn a more cheerful note, I like your blog's new look :)
Thank you!
DeleteSmaller bites, more chewing.....maybe have a doctor take a look at your throat????
ReplyDeletei'll go for the smaller bites and more chewing, but doctors are pretty much useless :)
DeleteYou could always do what we did at the nursing home I used to work at and purée everything! Mushy roast dinner is ... an experience.
ReplyDeleteThat makes me think of my dad - the mushy food at nursing homes :(
DeleteOh Judy, that's kind of scary with the choking. You're right though, even these "smaller" incidents help us to be more sympathetic about the randomest of things.
ReplyDeletePlease don't puree your steak.
Ya, I'm having second thoughts about the steak purée :)
DeleteWow! I must've missed that post. How scary! I'm glad you didn't die! I don't blame you for not wanting to eat anything you'd have to chew.
ReplyDeleteI choke on carrots and bread, not always, but often enough to know it's scary. I chew and I think I take normal bites, but it still happens sometimes. You have my sympathy.
ReplyDeleteCarrot sandwiches?!
DeleteJust the thought of choking terrifies me. I'd be leery about eating now, too.
ReplyDeleteIf I could just use that to my favor and lose a pound or two :)
DeleteThe good news is your blog is lovely!!
ReplyDeleteSpaghetti gets me every time. Imagine being an Italian girl and fearing the thought of eating spaghetti! Inevitably a piece of pasta will wrap itself around that dangly thing in the back of my throat and I go into instant panic mode. Ugh. I feel for you. I've thought many times it would be best if I just stuck to soup! :p
ReplyDeleteThis made me gag - :)
DeleteI saw my son nearly choke on a grape probably ten years ago...suffice to say, those are never put in the lunch boxes!
ReplyDeleteLove the spookiness here with the blog decor!
As a mother that must have been horrifying :(
DeleteLove the new Halloween look! I should do that to celebrate my son's halloween arrival. I choked on a peanut two weeks ago and it traumatized me. My husband was beating on my back while I struggled for air. My biggest fear in that my children will choke and that I will panic or freeze in their time of need. Good luck with the straw food.
ReplyDeleteThank goodness your husband was there. And we moms can so extraordinary things when our children are in danger - hopefully though you'll never be put to the test !
Deletehad to google a lot trying to keep up with you :)
ReplyDeleteThank you for your persistence, Anni :)
Deletemy son once choked on a piece of ice---he was just being recognized at a cub scout dinner--everyone was looking at us and pointing to him, who was on the side of where i was sitting--i thought they were just saying how cute he was---it was horrible--but it ended okay---i hope you don't have this happen anymore!!
ReplyDeleteWhich is why I drink chocolate milkshakes all the time...
ReplyDeleteI am sorry for your horrible experience, but I really admire that you are looking for the lesson and wisdom in it. I think you're totally right that experiencing something like that can open up your heart and mind to the experiences of others.
ReplyDeleteAnd pureed food--ugh. It's one of my phobias, for sure. Sooooo disturbing.