Monday, June 18, 2012

Still Here Making Lists


Still here . . .

We are hoping that Damian - I mean, Little Boy - gets to move to Arizona soon (hopefully 2-3 weeks).   So, I am writing a list for his new family.    I hate lists.   But this list is necessary.   It's a list of his behavior problems.   Lying, manipulating, anger problems.  Triangulating (I learned that term from his social worker) - he tries to pit me and my husband against each other.  And to be honest, when I have to leave for Oklahoma, I am kind of dreading leaving LB alone with my husband.  I don't want him (Little Boy) to feel like he's won . . . me gone, him alone with Mr. Wonderful.  I know that's childish of me, but I can't help it.  

Anyway, we are going to send this list with the social worker when he drops off Little Boy.   No way are we sending it to AZ family before - - we don't want them to change their minds!!  Ha. 
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23 comments:

  1. Plant Seeds of HappinessJune 18, 2012 at 11:55 AM

    jUDY DO YOU DO FOSTER CARE? OR JUST SOCIAL WORK? I JUST SENT OUR FOSTER DAUGHTER BACK TO HER AUNT BUT BEING 16 AND SUCH AN INFLUENCE TO OUR 9 YR OLD WE HAD TO STOP IT FROM EFFECTING OUR LIVES THIS TIME AROUND IT IS ROUGH EITHER WAY. gOOD LUCK ON YOUR LISTS :}

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    1. JudyJune 18, 2012 at 12:24 PM

      Janice, we're not really foster parents. This is a little boy who went to my husband's school, and we decided to let him live with us while paperwork was being done to have him move out of state. After this experience, i have new respect for people who DO do foster care. I won't do it again, sadly.

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  2. AndreaJune 18, 2012 at 12:26 PM

    I wish that experience had gone better for you. Hope the fact that you did a good thing gives it some glimmer of a fond memory.

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    1. JudyJune 18, 2012 at 4:15 PM

      He IS happy, but there's nothing like a permanent home to make you feel safe and secure :)

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  3. JoJoJune 18, 2012 at 1:08 PM

    You never know....when he grows up he may thank you guys for giving him a home. I hope that he is able to get the counseling he needs. Sad situation.

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    1. JudyJune 18, 2012 at 4:16 PM

      Yes, it is sad. But I think he'll be really happy with his family in AZ :)

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  4. Marianne (Mare) Baker BallJune 18, 2012 at 3:44 PM

    Hope the trip goes well. You can only do the best you know how to at the time. :-) Just read your bio - I love John Grisham too. And While You Were Sleeping. God bless you!

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    1. JudyJune 18, 2012 at 4:16 PM

      Thanks! Love the end of And While You Were Sleeping - I'm a romantic!

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  5. Funny in My MindJune 18, 2012 at 3:44 PM

    I am sure he just does those things to keep people from getting attached to him when they are going to hurt him. Makes it difficult for the people trying to give him a decent life though.
    I hope his forever family has the patience to change his behavior or he will just keep bouncing around and probably end up a criminal of sorts.
    I would never have the patience you have had, for a child not even my own.
    I have enough trouble dealing with all of the problems my 21 year old has.

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    1. JudyJune 18, 2012 at 4:17 PM

      Hopefully he is going to his forever family soon and it will be happily forever after :)

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  6. Tamera BroseJune 18, 2012 at 4:07 PM

    It would be great if LB was gone before you had to leave for OK. He may think he won if you have to leave sooner, but you know it's not true. Think of it as a vacation from him and you are the winner. Maybe he'll be gone before you get back. I know it won't be a fun trip to OK whenever it happens. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

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  7. JudyJune 18, 2012 at 4:18 PM

    Thanks, Tammy. Hope you have had luck with your customer service people and making your own travel plans!

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  8. LisaJune 18, 2012 at 4:27 PM

    Hang in there, my friend! You guys are amazing!! Safe travels!

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  9. Julie DeMilleJune 18, 2012 at 4:56 PM

    You've done a great thing with him. Hopefully his family will be able to love him and help him.
    (My prayers are with you and your family. Times like that make me so grateful for the gospel.)

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    1. JudyJune 18, 2012 at 7:43 PM

      So so grateful for the gospel :). Thanks Jewels

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  10. DanaJune 18, 2012 at 7:09 PM

    Hugs and prayers. What a difficult situation...

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  11. Journey of LifeJune 18, 2012 at 7:58 PM

    I still admire you for taking him in at first place. Bless your heart.

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    1. JudyJune 18, 2012 at 9:20 PM

      Thank you :). We're all on this journey of life together!

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  12. bettyJune 18, 2012 at 8:41 PM

    You got to feel sorry for the little one (and I know you do despite all the struggles he causes). Imagine what would have been like if he got to stay with the family he was born into or at least the mom or dad. I'm sure over time he learned a lot of those behaviors for survival or just to cope, which is just so sad. You were very kind to do what you did to help him, but I know it has been a struggle for you all.

    betty

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  13. JenniferJune 19, 2012 at 6:29 AM

    You had the best of intentions. It's too bad the situation didn't go better for you. Either way , I think you and your hubby are angels.

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